My Grandfather
I spend more time thinking about my grandfather on his birthday now that he’s no longer alive than I did while he was among the living. You see, my grandfather wasn’t much of a birthday man. When I called on his birthday, he’d quickly change the subject and that would be the end of that. He absolutely didn’t need anything and if you spent any money on him, you’d have to prepare yourself for a lecture on penny saving. One of his favorite things to tell me was, “Cyan, a penny saved is a penny earned”. He was never impressed by spending money on gifts and it was a sign of failure when I did, so I just decided to forget about his birthday all together.
He was a very handsome man. Measuring in at 6′3″ and all muscle. He wasn’t the bulky type, but very toned from years of building houses and working on farms. When I saw him out working on the garden or out in the fields, I always thought that he looked like he was chiseled from rock. He was iconic. He wore overalls, short sleeved shirts, baseball caps that he probably found on the side of the freeway somewhere and leather shoes. My grandfather lacked style, yet he defined it. When he was younger, he had a full head of hair, but towards the end he had a few black tufts that formed a circle towards the top of his head. He washed his hair with Ivory soap and never understood the female obsession with shampoo and conditioner. He didn’t fight it and let us have it, but he told us often that he thought it was totally pointless and that a good ol’ bar of Ivory soap was fine enough for him, so it should be good enough for us.
My grandfather was a mathematician farmer. He taught math during the school year, made jewelry and pottery at night and on weekends and spent the summers farming. When he retired, he quit all but the farming. For some reason, he could never give that up.
The man was obsessed with saving pennies. He had a system for saving those pennies everywhere. Here are some of them and there are thousands more:
* We left the hot water tank off at all times and only turned it on when it was time to take a shower or do a large amount of dishes.
* We never used the dishwasher because it consumed too much water.
* The dryer was only to be used for blankets and during thunder or snow storms. If there was wind in the air and it wasn’t freezing, you were expected to hang your clothes on a line.
* He put his car in neutral and coasted down hills. He claimed this saved on gas.
* He altered his car and took out the catalytic converter to turn his car from a 20 miles per gallon vehicle to something in the 80s, but completely illegal in most states.
* We reused aluminum foil. I had to wash, dry and put it away.
* We traded our veggies that we grew with other farmers and we only bought milk, candy, ice cream, soda, spices and sugar at the grocery store. All other things we grew or traded. My grandfather fished or hunted for most of our meat.
* Our vehicles didn’t have a single automatic thing in them. This saved money on eventual repairs for the electronic gizmos that would fail and make him unhappy.
* We burned wood in the winter only at night to keep warm. The rest of the time we wore sweaters.
* We shopped at estate sales, yard sales, flea markets and discount stores. We were never allowed to buy something full priced. It always had to be on sale.
* Coupons. Coupons. Coupons.
I hated a lot of these things when I was growing up. I always thought that his thrifty energy could be spent doing other things. I never thought he was living his life, but he was. He was playing a non-stop video game of penny saving and he was doing it for me and the rest of my family. My grandfather found worth in these activities and felt like an accomplished man.
He was everything to me, soapy head and all, even though he came from a different era of mad men. He had strange ideas about people and the world around us, but it doesn’t matter, because he was a good man and I love him and there’s not a day that goes by where I don’t miss him or think about him, especially on his birthday.
Happy birthday Grandpa.
